Joy

I can't really can't complain much. Life has been pretty solid so far. I feel like I'm missing out on something right now still though. Its not just the money, almost like part of me is missing. I love the studio and I got used to being able to share it with everyone, and record it. I got used to feeling important, to being heard, but now that is no more, I'm on hiatus, maybe indefinitely, who knows. 

This break is making me realize a couple things, the first being that I cant take for granted what we have, and the second being that Chinese takeout is hella good. I got a-lot of time, a-lot running through my head, I got few rhymes, and females runnin to my bed. For now I'm just going to relax and do me. That's all I can do, I feel helpless yet free at the same time. I'm still trying to figure out the whole story of what happened to me though.

The other day I stopped by the studio around closing time, though it never closes, it was Sunday, and I know Jessie always leaves around 2 or 3. I waited outside of the studio by his car in the lot. Low and behold, out comes Jessie. He immediately yelled at me "Whats good son?! What you doin here?" I told him what id been up to, alot of chillin, and asked the same to him. He told me about the studio, about how some girl sounded like she was going to shatter the glass in the booth the other day, and how the Label has been unhappy with the studio recently, Jessie said he thinks it'll only be a matter of time before I'm back in action, he made a point to say that I have to prove myself to the label before I can just waltz back in, I fucked up. 

We went to Mr. Mike's Pastries to get a late, and improper Sunday lunch. Over slices of cake, and cookies I posed the question of the gun again to Jessie. He froze up, gave me an intense stare, and said "This isn't the place to talk about this Ster, and I'm not the person to talk about this, talk to our boy Byron. I can't believe you don't remember this shit man."

Phew! Thats good news, it doesnt seem that the situation has escalated, I could've committed murder for all I knew, but Jessie's demeanor reassured me nothing of that caliber occured. Now I just need to call Byron... again. Joy.